Hello Folks!
A brief prelude….This is my first post here in more than a year! Yes, really, it has been that long. Wow. So it may be a shock to actually see a post here, but here it is!
Why Do I Keep Falling In Love?
Yes, why do I keep falling in love? Sometimes it seems like weakness, sometimes insanity but it always seems wonderful to me. That is the short answer – I love being in love. And I don’t mean the short, superficial kind; I mean the deep, powerful soul-shaking kind. I love when that happens and strive to keep it alive and growing for as long as I can.
However, what is really behind my desire to be in love? I wonder about that sometimes because one of the unfortunate side effects, at least for me, is that I sometimes hurt and feel pain. At various times in my life, this kind of pain almost killed me and did some serious damage to my heart center, damage that took a long time to heal. Knowing that this could happen, why would I opt in again? I think this is why.
Being with an intimate partner is, for me, like living in two different worlds simultaneously. I realized that as I was comparing my current single status to what it was like living in a loving relationship, I noticed that I only occupy one world, my world. And that world is pretty boring; let’s face it I’ve lived in that world for more than 60 years now. The experience of my alone world is vastly different than when I experience it within the world of another.
The accompaniment, the counter-point, the harmonious melody I experience while living in a loving, intimate relationship, is simply joyous. I enter into another dimension of my consciousness and my humanity when I am with someone I love. Not only I am fascinated with learning about their world, I also discover reams of new information about mine. I learn about my behavior patterns, my preferences, and most of all, the deep spiritual self that lives in me. In relationships, I have learned so much about myself and others, it is quite amazing, and when new challenges slide into my life, more growth becomes quickly available.
So, yes; I benefit greatly from being in love and I also become more capable of benefiting the one I love. Loving has transformed me and my life many times. I know too that my love has made an impact on those I have loved. Recollections of those experiences tend to vary from reality, if there really is one, so I don’t spend much time imagining what impact I had on others. I am too busy imaging the impact they had on me! LOL!
The only chance I have of gaining any wisdom during my lifetime is to be open and listening for guidance of Spirit. I am clear that left to my own intellect, I would continue to blunder about through life, as likely to smash my head as to walk through an open door way. Without the development of my consciousness and my desire to access it and use it in my life, I would suffer much more than I do now. Oh yes, I still suffer, but at least I am conscious of it now, I can step outside and away from it. From this perspective, I can shift the energy of the suffering and bring it into the light of my consciousness. I can then transform the energy from darkness and sadness to light and joy. However, doing so reliably is a life long endeavor; I readily admit I am far from having that level of power in my life. Living within intimate love gives me access to that power.